How to do laundry in 25 easy steps.

Step 1.  Take a shower.

Step 2.  Complete shower, begin process of getting dressed.

Step 3.  Realize that you do not have clean underwear, socks, shirts, or pants.

Step 4.  Attempt to locate hamper.

Step 5.  Realize that hamper is hidden well beneath every item of clothing you own.

Step 6.  Sift through your clothes, looking for something "cleanish" or if you're lucky, something clean that got absorbed into your dirty clothes pile.

Step 7.  Fail.  Decide it's time to do laundry.

Step 8.  Dutifully sort your laundry into piles by color and fabric.

Step 9.  Give up on sorting after 45 seconds; form "laundry ball." 

Step 10.  Huck the laundry ball into the washing machine and set the machine to cold.

Step 11.  Forget you're in a towel, start to play video games or watch TV or read if you're a nerd.

Step 12.  Emerge four hours later and remember the towel. 

Step 13.  Transfer laundry ball from washing machine to dryer. Set to low heat to avoid shrinking and to buy enough time to play another game of NBA 2K14.

Step 14.  Fall asleep on the coach, still in the towel.

Step 15.  Emerge four hours later and remember the towel.

Step 16.  Open the dryer and take out just the items of clothing that you plan to wear at that exact moment.

Step 17.  Proceed with your day.

Step 18.  Return to the dryer the next day; only take the clothes you need at that very moment.

Step 19.  Repeat Step 18 the next day.

Step 20.  Remove remaining laundry ball from dryer, transfer to hamper. 

Step 21.  Carry hamper to bedroom, leave it in the middle of the floor. 

Step 22.  Select just the clothes that you need, when you need them. 

Step 23.  Start to pile dirty clothes on top of clean clothes. 

Step 24.  Slowly forget where clean clothes start and dirty clothes end.

Step 25.  Begin the original process.